Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Tuesday SmackDown: We're Cleaning the 7-Year-Olds' Rooms (Heaven Help Us).


So my friend Gretchen and I were commiserating the other day about how much alike our daughters Lila and Maggie are—they’re both super smart, super funny, super stubborn and bossy as all get-out—when we both discovered that our little giggle nuts are… hmm, a nice way to say this… SLOBS.


No, seriously. Our girls are just gross on the highest levels. For sure, both Lila and Maggie’s rooms are so junky, Gretchen and I were actually considering stretching that yellow crime scene tape across their bedroom doors—you know, for the protection of children and small animals. Our girls drop toys/books/clothes/shoes/boxes/papers/art supplies/random small items wherever they were playing with them last, and no matter how much yelling/begging/threatening/bribing we do, neither of the girls practices the simple art of cleaning up behind herself. To be fair, both Gretchen and I think too few storage solutions + the fact that the girls are still too little to clean such a massive mess = recipe for this disaster:

EXHIBIT A (Lila's Mess)

EXHIBIT B (Maggie's Mess)

Note the freakish similarities. The horse stables. The guitars strewn about. The desktop mountains of clutter. The bald-headed babies.

It's all just so very wrong.

Wrong, we tell you.

But summer vacation is over and our girls, newly minted second graders, are back in school.

Gretchen and I are going in.

To support one another, Gretchen and I decided to throw ourselves into what we’ve dubbed The Tuesday Smackdown. That’s right: We’re putting on our hazmat suits, getting out our oversized, heavy-duty trash bags, our rubber gloves and our mops and buckets, and we’re going to… gasp!... clean our girls’ rooms. Alas, the 7-year-olds can’t handle the gig. And we moms can’t take it anymore. So clean, we must.


Our strategy? We’re going to be downright ruthless. Whatever isn’t an absolute essential/beloved toy/nailed down is going into trash bags—one headed for The Salvation Army, the other headed straight to the curb (made all the more easy by the fact that our daughters will be sitting in a classroom today, completely oblivious to the gangsta cleaning that’s about to take place).

Oh, believe me: It’s. About. To. Go. Down.

Want to see the results? Check back here around 4 p.m. for an update and pictures of their pig pens-turned-sweet little girl rooms.

*Makes sign of the cross.*

Pray for us.

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  1. ha!! aye yes!!! I remember those days like it was yesterday in my baby sister's room at my folks' house! Good luck! EEk! i dont envy you all! ha!

  2. I can't wait to see the "after" photos! Cleaning my 10 year old's room is looming on my horizon!

  3. LOL! Looks like my girls' room. We need to tackle their mess too - maybe we'll do it today. My approach starts with a big black trash bag; girls don't like that much. :)

  4. 30 minutes in - 2 trash bags already full. Wonder if I bought enough trash bags . . .

  5. Wow you guys are brave! Do you think the girls will have a melt down and go searching for the trash bags to audit you guys decision? I can't wait until 4 to see the results. Good luck.

  6. Good luck on that tackle! I am going to wait until the older one vacates for Spain this fall before I try to tackle their room:-)

  7. oh my looks like there has been alot of fun in there

  8. That is hilarious! I have an almost 7 year old daughter that I think I will have to use these tactics on!

  9. Denene, Gretchen, you brave souls! I say that because not only are you guys braving the wild, you're showing it to the world! I seriously thought I had to be the only mother in the wide world to even let my kids rooms get like this. I've been known to shut down whole planned play (let's-trash-the-place-some-more) sessions and move them elsewhere, thinking my kids friends would go home to their mama's telling them how much a dump Autumn and Jalen's place is, LOL! Man! Good luck ladies, and I too will be checking back for those after pics. :)

  10. You know what, when I reflect back to my younger days I remember being such a slob. But once I got to college and had a roommate things changed. I was much neater than my roommate and have been that way since. Now don't get me wrong I do know how to keep a messy room, but I prefer to have a clean home. It will get better. I'm living proof.

  11. Let us know how many trash bags you end up filling. Something about kids and rooms...


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