Thursday, February 11, 2010

John Mayer, the Biggest Loser



It's not that John Mayer has a preference for white girls.

Or even that the guitarist/singer said it out loud—in a Playboy interview, no less, after a journalist asked him if his "hood pass" entices black women to toss the panties his way.

It's HOW he said it that has me deleting all of his music off my iTunes playlist and tossing his CDs in the trash. Witness:

PLAYBOY: Do black women throw themselves at you?

MAYER: I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.


Yeah.

Mind you, this pearl came just after he'd finished pontificating on how much black people love him and what it means to be African American. For good measure, he tossed in the "N" word—you know, so the ignant mofos could hear him.

I'm guessing he thought a couple of collabos with Common and Kanye, or playing guitar in a couple of gigs with Jay-Z, The Roots, and Dave Chappelle like, gave him the right. Clearly, the brothers never explained to Johnny that it's just never, ever a good idea for white folk, no matter how cool you think you are with black folk, to go there. Ever.

Of course, the Twitterverse lit his butt up over the outrageous statements—enough to coax a self-loathing, kinda-sorta tweet apology from his dumb ass:

"Re: Using the 'N word' in an interview: I am sorry that I used the word. And it's a shame that I did because the point I was trying to make was the exact opposite spirit of the word itself. It was arrogant of me to think I could intellectualize using it, because I realize there's no intellectualizing a word that is so emotionally charged."

Later, he tweeted:

"And while I'm using today for looking at myself under harsh light, I think it's time to stop trying to be so raw in interviews."

"I just wanted to play the guitar for people. Everything else just sort of popped up and I improvised, and kept doubling down on it..."

Cry me a river, boo.

I think it should be noted that he's yet to address the "My peen is a racist" comment, and even worse, people—seemingly of all colors, all sexes, all backgrounds—are damn near flipping over backward to defend his right to express his preference for white women.

Here's the thing, John (and the Mayerites who don't understand the outrage): If your tool only works with women whose skin matches yours, no problem with me, my dude. Do you. My vagina happens to be highly selective, too. *Kanye shrug* But you do not EVER tell anyone with a microphone in your face that your male member is as racist as a member of a terrorist organization that routinely LYNCHED, BRUTALLY MURDERED, AND SYSTEMATICALLY DESTROYED American citizens and their homes and their families simply because they were black. No matter how sarcastic or funny you thought you were being, that single quote made many of us feel like you absolutely HATE, with an unyielding passion, black girls. It was insulting to black women—all women, really—and reinforces the stereotype that African American women are unattractive and sexually undesirable (unless you're Kerry Washington, who, according to your Playboy quote, is "white girl crazy" enough to be an acceptable lay because she'll "suck a dick" and "be like, whatever"). These stereotypes—the ugly, undesirable, the hypersexualized freak—we black women battle day in and day out, around every corner, at every turn. We really didn't need you to pile on. Surely there had to be a better way for you to shout out your love of white girls without tearing down an entire race of black women for something they can not change.

But I guess no one has ever accused you of being an intellectual.

And nobody ever really gives a rat's ass about a black woman's feelings or our right to be offended.

Now, don't get it twisted: I don't feel bad about myself because you don't want to sleep with women who look like me. Neither you nor your music has that kind of power over me. But maybe while you're examining your "Benetton heart" under all the harsh light, you can marinate on how hurtful your words were. And maybe consider, too, the way you talk about and treat ALL women (your kiss-and-tell quotes about former flames Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston and women in general were no less than bovine). Maybe you could consider, too, just how disturbing it is to your fans—WOMEN, black, white, and everything in between—that a man who would write such a stunningly poignant song like "Daughters"—a song reminding fathers to truly love their baby girls so that they can grow up to be women who can truly open themselves up to love—could be such a jackass to a bunch of mens' daughters.

Or maybe you can just shut the hell up and play your damn guitar.



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24 comments:

  1. wah, wah, what?! he must have bumped his head on his way to that interview. Mr Mayer should take your advice to "just shut the hell up and play [his] damn guitar.

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  2. Yes he needs to stick to just playing his guitar. That's what happens when people buy into their own fame and start thinking they don't need to wipe after they take a dump.

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  3. Thank you for writing this. I'm really amazed that he said all this. An apology doesn't cut it for me because the fact remains that he still feels that way and wouldn't have apologized if people hadn't become outraged by it. I really can't believe what he said about Kerry Washington, WOW just WOW. I hope many follow your actions and throw out his CDs and delete his music. I was just going to try out one of his CDs but not anymore.

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  4. Denene,
    Thank you for writing this! I am tired of explaining why his comments made me so angry. Your article fully articulates the outrage that many black women felt.

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  5. Shame on him...shame on him two times. He is free to love who he chooses, however, his comments in the Playboy article were simply unwarranted and very derogatory. Sometimes a loss of income is a wake-up call...let's hope he doesn't press the snooze bar.

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  6. Wow, Denene! Great blog...I can honestly say I never liked John Mayer or his music (not what I prefer)...now I can honsetly say why...Thanks for the post 'cause otherwise I wouldn't have known..

    Shila

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  7. Very well said. His "so called" apologies made him look even more ignorant in my opinion.

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  8. This was a fabulous post. (note to self to never get in an argument with you!) What an idiot. Why do people still a) even think like that and b) why are they dumb enough to TALK like that in this day and age where they have to know people are going to find out how ignorant they are.

    I do enjoy some of his songs and his guitar skills, but I don't think I'll be listening anymore. It would just make me sick.

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  9. Thanks for for your post... John is going to see what it is like to be "blackballed" with those ignorant comments

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  11. Wow! Very well said! (or..written) Thanks for this! I constantly wonder when artists are going to realize that maybe they should just do what they are good at and perform/entertain, and not let the public in on what is going on in their heads. It would be better for all of us!

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  12. Amen on every level. This was an excellent post in response to his stupidity. How could he not think in this yet to be United States of America, black women would not take offense to his comments on top of him using the n-word in an interview. The things some artists will do and say for attention.

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  13. I have a specific idea of what he can do with his guitar, and it doesn't involve playing it. What a creepy, skeevy, downright pathetic excuse for a man, and he isn't even all that talented! As the white mom of two black daughters, I'm speechless that someone would have the audacity to think like that - let alone say it! What a load of crap, and thank you for shining a strong light on that little cockroach.

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  14. I am so happy my daughter is only two years old. Being a woman is already difficult in a youth obsessed, thin only, and plastic please society. Our present culture rakes a woman's self image over hot burning coals. Now, it's okay to insult an entire ethnic group to gain attention in an interview? Scary times!

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  15. I give a rat's ass, and I think he's toast. Justifiably.

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  16. Thanks for writing this Denene. I was stunned when I read about John Mayer's interview and his comments especially the one that included black women, KKK and David Duke...WOW. I was so close on Tuesday to buying a ticket for his concert that's in my town this coming Sunday, but I choose Robin Thicke instead even though I've already seen him in concert. Now I know why I did that and so happy now with that decision. Sorry John Mayer,this black woman who is A-Okay with you not be attracted to her because the feeling goes both ways, is not okay with you making the KKK, David Duke 2nd class comparision and is no longer a fan. You just lost your "hood pass" as far as I'm concerned. I hope all women would take a stand and put you on blast.

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  17. I only wish he could read this. Even if he did I'm sure he doesn't "get it".

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  18. I beleive he's insulting to all women - regardless of their colour. In fact, the only good thing about being a black woman in this instance is the fact that we don't need to worry about him sleazing on us, like he does with other white women. I've never been a fan of his, but now I'll happyily turn off the radio when his songs come on. What a piece of trash!!!

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  19. John Mayer is a pig. His comments in this interview along with many others now make it so I cringe whenever I hear his music and very quickly change the station. He is rude, crude and acts as if every woman in the world wants him (which is totally crazy).

    I applaud this post and hope that one day, he gets to read it and it makes him change. I hope that he changes before he procreates too so he doesn't raise any closeminded, crude little Johns or raise his daughter to think that she is on this earth for no other reason than to please a man in bed.

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  20. I was SOOOO hurt, bc I am (was) the biggest JM fan in life. I tried for years to convince my black frinds to get on the JM train, and he goes and says some mess like that!

    OUTRAGE!

    It's fine not to be into black girls, but to bring up David Duke? Come on, son. Even you should know better than that.

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