Tuesday, April 28, 2009

MyBrownSpotlight: BlackandMarriedWithKids.com

You all know how passionate I am about celebrating black love--I've written books and magazine articles about it, talked about it on television and radio, and, of late, dedicated many a blog post encouraging each of us to embrace, nurture, and protect African American couples working hard to make their unions work--despite the statistics, no matter the odds.

It's no wonder, then, that I stan HARD for BlackandMarriedWithKids.com, the incredible, award-winning site that Essence.com lauded for "spreading the message" that "black love is alive and well.. one blog post at a time." BMWK is the love child of Lamar and Ronnie Tyler, a happily married D.C-area couple with four kids who use their site to espouse their opinions on relationships, parenting, politics, current events and everything in between. Their story line-up is eclectic and ever-changing: You might find a post about how to get over an argument with your significant other, or a piece that asks you to consider what kind of marriage role model you are to your children, and even music and popular viral videos that'll make you giggle.

More recently, BMWK partnered with two other sites--Celebrity Black Families and Cocoa Familia--to add celebrity content (all positive) and product reviews to their mix. And, as if they're not busy enough, the two are producing their first movie (!), a documentary aptly titled, Happily Ever After: Stories of Black Marriages and Why They Work. Check out the trailer:

A round of applause for Lamar and Ronnie; I absolutely adore their site, and I know you will too. Stop by BlackandMarriedWithKids.com and say "Hello." You'll be glad you did!

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  1. I love their blog. Great pick, I am a huge supporter of Beautiful Black Love myself. Black Love is Beautiful!!

  2. Hi! (again) Love your blog, I keep finding myself coming back to it! As a white reader, I never noticed major differences in race growing up or even up until now (growing up with a foreign single parent was overwhelming enough-people telling my mother to go back to where she came from-yikes.)
    but today I was reading the Blogspot featured blogs, and one of them is http://blackandmissing.blogspot.com/.
    I clicked on this, and it shows many african american children that are missing that I've never seen on the news. My first thought was "How did these kids go unnoticed?" I immediately found myself back here, in a weird way looking for an answer. Why doesn't the news show the children on this site?
    Your blog has such an integrity- a connection with the reader. What is the answer?

  3. Thanks Denene! We love Black Love! 15 years in a good marriage and counting.

  4. I plan to go today and check them out. Thanks, married for 13 years and counting...

  5. @Kat: Thank you SO much for hanging out here at MyBrownBaby and certainly for the compliment. I'm so pleased that you feel the connection; it's important to me that this blog feel like home, and that everyone take away (and give!) a piece or two of information that will help them navigate this wondrous journey we call motherhood.

    As for your question about why missing kids of color go unnoticed in mainstream news media: To be blunt, the plight of these children isn't covered because they simply aren't valued by these news organizations like white children are.

    I think we can all tick off the names of white children--little girls, specifically--whose stories of abuse/abduction/murder become national sensations, inspiring outrage/sympathy/calls to action. They deserve the coverage, too--I'd never take that away from them. No child should go missing without every one of us using every bit of our resources to find the child/bring their attackers to justice.

    However, we can not dismiss that, whether intentional or not, our brown babies simply get treated as if they are less important/valuable than their white counterparts. It's infuriating. Sad. Frustrating. Wrong.

    Perhaps the families of the missing black kids don't have the resources/publicity arms needed to get the word out. Or maybe the editors who decide what's newsworthy are desensitized to the pain and agony black parents face when their children go missing. Whichever the case, SOMEBODY should do better by brown babies. Thank God that blackandmissing.blogspot.com is bringing attention to the issue.

    But much, much more needs to be done. We ALL can start by pointing out the injustice and encouraging our loved ones/friends/acquaintances to speak up about the issue. Perhaps you could share your discovery on your blog, and rally your blog buddies to do the same. Write a letter to your local newspaper, or leave comments on the sites of news organizations who've neglected to cover black missing children like they have those of white kids.

    That's to say that YOU can be an advocate for change just as easily as blackandmissing.blogspot can. Turn your search for an answer into action.



  6. This is wonderful. I subscribe to their blog and I love it. I love celebrating black love. We need more of it.

  7. Wow! What a post. I especially enjoyed reading your reply to Kat. Definitely teaches me to take the time to read all of your comments going forward. I am not sure where I learned more, there or in your actual post.

    I love the positive message that exudes from your blog. If you say BMWK is worth a visit, then I am off. :)


  8. Great Post, not enough can be said about the importance of Black marriage. We must strive to not allow it to be a thing of the past.

  9. Denene, I made it my priority to blog about BlackandMissing.blogspot.com today! It's not much, but I really did try. You were right, I could at least do that... although I think you'd have done much better!
    If mine's isn't good, I'm loving the idea of guest blogger for the day :)?

  10. Lamar and Ronnie do a great job with Blackandmarriedwithkids.com. I read the blog daily.


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