See here’s the thing: This baby is adorable—I’ll give her that.
And I’m impressed with her ability to pick up on and break down the latest dance craze at such a tender age.
*Even as she still struggles with finding her way to a toilet on her own (as evidenced by the droopy diaper).*
What I don’t get is why this child—a baby!—is on YouTube in knee-socks and the aforementioned droopy diaper, popping her booty and bumpin’ and grindin’ and doing “The Stanky Leg” on top of a table, like the only show she’s allowed to watch in her house is 106th & Park.
She’s not singing the Barney song.
She’s not doing the Elmo “coochie coochie coo” laugh.
Dora? Who’s Dora?
Nooooo… this baby—BABY!—is doing The Stanky Leg.
Now, I’m not going to talk about this child’s mother, because I don’t know who it is who foisted her onto the kitchen table and proceeded to cackle and curse and goad the baby into dropping it like it’s hot for all of the world to see. It could very well be a goofy teenage sibling holding the video recorder. Or a really horrible babysitter.
Whoever it is that made all of this foolywang possible, I wish I could get her in a quiet room for just a couple of minutes—or perhaps take her out to a nice lunch. Maybe explain to her the kind of damage that’s being done to this little girl, who, not even out of diapers, is half-naked and being encouraged to bend over and bounce up and down on a table in front of a camera. When is this ever cute or okay?
The baby knows not what she does; she’s simply mimicking whatever madness she’s been exposed to at such a tender age, when responsible adults—parents—should be off somewhere reading to her and building puzzles with her and pushing her on the swings at the local park.
But when that little girl hits age 10 and gets to jiggling and popping it at the 5th grade dance like she’s Karrine Steffans on the come-up, I hope her mother doesn’t try to get new and act like she’s surprised.
Just go to YouTube and see where all of it began.